bathroom faux-pas

**disclaimer: this is about bathrooms…do not read on if you don’t like people’s interactions with bathrooms**


The bathroom is a sacred place. It’s a place of solitude, a place of peace, where you can think and be alone with your thoughts. Well today, I may have taken it a bit too far. So I was in the 3rd stall today on the 10th floor men’s room, doing my thing, minding my own business. For the record, I like to zone out a bit when I’m in there. In a world of cubicles and open offices/conference rooms, it’s pretty much the only place you can go to be alone with your thoughts.

Anyways, I was in there doing some thinking (don’t judge), when I started thinking about music, specifically Meaghan Smith’s It Snowed (love that song). Playing music in my head is a nice way to pass the time, but yea, tragically it didn’t end there. By the time I realized what I was doing, I was whistling the chorus of the song. That’s when it occurred to me: I’m not the only one in the bathroom.

Ohhhh nooooo…

As a matter of fact, in the afternoon, the bathroom gets a decent amount of traffic. Great. Now what do I do?? Of course I cut off the song mid-verse (just when I got to the good part too!!) and waited…and waited…and waited. There was a chuckle by the sink, but the guy left right after. At this point, I try to use my ears to take inventory of who else is left in the bathroom. Aside from the guy at the sink, there seemed to be three other people in the bathroom. I need to wait for them to clear out, then make my daring escape.

Four minutes go by, two guys leave, talking about work on the way out. One left. Ok, since this guy’s occupied in the next stall, I surmise that it’s time to channel my inner Steve McQueen and make a great escape (sans the germans, electric fences, and a motorcycle chase…). The second I hear toilet-paper unraveling next door, I quickly flush and fly out of the stall. So stealthy and nimble was I that I had washed, dried, and departed the bathroom before the stall door closed. Ohh yea, bathroom escape ninja-turtle style. As I get back to my desk, I think of the close call from just seconds ago. *sigh* crisis averted.